Irish Mums were Our Idea

We invented Whiskey related Violence

Irish people invented Australians

Irish invented monkies

Only Irish People

Only Irish people like alcohol, every one else just copies us to be cool (or cúla búla) and secretly hates it. Irish people invented potatoes and only we can eat them properly, while shouting at people and laughing, which only Irish people do at the same time.

Irish people invented being a farmer but not farming. Irish people invented having a really bad government and healthcare system, everywhere else is great. The grass always is greener. Irish people invented complaining and mumbling under our breath. We also invented women that don't wear veils and drink pints and have short hair cuts and wear pants but still make babies. Irish women invented babies in 1640-spud but Irish men invented shouting drunkenly at their wives while the baby cries.

An Irishman invented the gaydar, but it was orginally used for finding lost sheep. Irish people were the first the make openly racist remarks with the 'get out of being a racist jail free' card of "Im not a racist....BUT......"

Irish people invented inverted commas but then sold them for plain commas because inverted commas were too fancy and it was a sin. Irish people invented original Sin. This was originally called 'no ones perfect' but had to shorten the name because of the famine.